As we enter our 49th week of quarantine, I thought I would--- Hm?. What’s that? We’re only on **checks notes** week two?
Is this a joke?
Our new quarantine meal plan looks similar to this, so even though we’re only ten days in, I’m up 32 pounds and drunk, thanks to starting a drinking game based on hearing the words, “I’m bored.”
Having kids complain about being bored is nothing new, certainly, where weekends without sports activities or planned playdates are filled with whining kids schlepping around the house and standing blindly in the pantry or with the fridge door wide open.
But our current state of affairs has made for boredom amplified by a bajillion.
Our kids - sheesh, even we - are so used to being spoon-fed entertainment, we get the panic sweats when we have big chunks of quiet.
But it’s ok to pause and take time away from TV, your phone, your friends.
Boredom is our brain’s way of seeking neural stimulation that isn’t being satisfied, according to Sandy Mann, senior psychology lecturer at The University of Lancashire in the U.K. and author of The Upside Of Downtime: Why Boredom Is Good.
“If we can’t find that, our mind will create it,” Mann says.
But we don’t ever give our brains the chance. We’ve become addicted to staying constantly occupied. Oh, don’t sit there and tell me you aren’t scrolling while you’re sitting at a red light, Janet.
As humans, we are simply not programmed to be mentally “on the go” during every waking moment. And as much as COVID-19 has upended our lives, there’s a part of me that wonders if this is the universe’s way of forcing us into a type of respite.
Whether that’s the case or not, this is an opportunity to embrace the fact that we’ve been forced into a vacuum.
I realize that being suddenly thrust into a state of doing nothing may make you anxious, but I say this for you just as much as for your children: our brains are desperate for a little boredom.
“Yes, yes - fine, but how do I deal with this child who’s sliding down my leg like it’s a greased pole, sobbing that she’ll be dead of boredom by sundown,” you ask? Ah yes.
Here’s how to help your bored child during quarantine
The thing is - and this is going to be hard at first, because this is new turf for all of us - but you don’t want to over-manage your child’s activities. In other words, you’ll be tempted to keep drumming up “something to do” to keep her entertained.
Don’t do that. Give her the space to come up with her own ideas of entertainment.
There are endless ideas of activities online right now for keeping kids busy: coloring activities, puzzles, word searches, crafts, blah-dee-blah. Search those up, have a few on-hand for the day, and then beyond that, have him come up with some ideas of his own.
I remember playing in my room for hours when I was a little girl. I played with my dolls, lining them up against the wall and pulling a workbook off my bookshelf and pretending I was the teacher and my dolls were students.
That kind of creative play was something I came up with on my own.
Because that’s what little girls did back in the olden days. (They also ran into the local Stop N’ Go for a pack of Salem Menthols for their mothers, but that’s for a different post.)
And listen. I’m going to say something crazy. Give your kid the device.
Electronic devices are not poison, they are not evil. There are countless educational apps and safety monitoring apps available. And there are also - obviously - tons of frivolous, non-educational apps and videos.
Let them have those, too.
Seriously. As long as you are spending time with your child each day and having strong, meaningful conversations together, his brain is not going to turn to mush, even though this is the lie that I often told my son during our pre-quarantine days.
Monitor their use of a device to make sure they don’t have access to unsafe sites or apps, and to make sure they can’t accidentally or not-accidentally search inappropriate content, and that they can’t have conversations with strangers.
And then let them loose to play. And you do the same.
For Additional Reading:
Best Parental Control Apps For Android And iPhone 2020, Toms Guide
Brain Benefits Of Boredom, Psychology Today
How We Can Still Connect While Social Distancing, Austin Moms (by me!)
